Stuck for ideas for Valentine's Day?

A quiet Saturday night in chez nous.

I’m attempting to make David Lebovitz’s Chocolate Chip Cookies with salted butter (yum) for my students for Valentine’s Day - yeah, I'm the nicest teacher in town.  However M and I have been scoffing most of them straight out of the oven, so the kiddies will be lucky to receive crumbs come Monday.

We’ve done some household jobs, I’ve done some school work, we’ve watched a film  - True Grit (not bad) and the 3^rd episode of the latest series of Skins - which I’m sad to say – kind of sucks.

So it’s 23.30 

                         

A quick scan of the TV channels and what should we find but a documentary called Sex in the World Cities – Sidney. (Not my spelling mistake - that's what it said).  Straight off the bat we hear a very distinct Aussie accent and the picture is showing Burlesque dancers and discussing its appeal – so we’re interested - plus, there were boobies for M.

The burlesque dancing ended.

Then – an elderly tanned man wearing only a metallic silver g-string and  Mad-Hatter-esque hat came on ..... and proceeded to paint a guy’s portrait 

.... with his penis.

I’m not kidding. I wish I was. 

French television has very different standards about nudity to Australia. 

And there was a lot of penis on display. And a lot of paint.

He goes by the nom de plume (or should that be, nom de knob?) of “Pricasso”.

You want to know the absolute kicker – that had us both screeching with laughter?

His paintings are actually pretty good. 

Where exactly does one hang one's portrait......painted with a penis??

Don’t believe me? He has a website. Look him up.

This is his info, taken directly from the website - no word of a lie:

There are Millions of Artists in the World...

BUT ONLY ONE WHO PAINTS WITH HIS PENIS

Many established Artists have commented on the speed accuracy and the unique way Pricasso can paint. Astute buyers have expressed the opinion that Pricasso's paintings will see an incredible appreciation in value due to the use of video as proof of authenticity, the quality, and physically he can only paint a limited amount due to the equipment being used.

I. LOVE. THIS.

“equipment being used” is his wang.

His self-portrait also reveals a rather healthy level of self-delusion.

Gold.

This + a disgusting amount of chocolate chip cookies = a great night in.

And I know exactly what to get M for Valentine's Day next year.

xxx 

B